Private Showing
by Ellie Dee
Summary: Do the guys ever do anything the easy way?


TITLE: "Private Showing."  
AUTHOR: Ellie Dee  
EMAIL: ellie_dee@hotmail.com  
RATING: PG  
PAIRING: M/S, D/R, B/Mo, Bo/H.  
SUMMARY: Do the guys ever do anything the easy way?  
SPOILERS: Consider anything through the series finale  
as being fair game.  
FEEDBACK: NO! I do this solely for all those empty   
spaces in my IN Box.... Yes, anything would be greatly   
appreciated.  
DISCLAIMER: CC owns all, tells little and teases us   
terribly.  
DISTRIBUTION: You want it? You can have it. Just please  
keep my name and Email on it and try to let me know   
where it's wandered off to.  
DEDICATION: To my little brother Daniel, the aspiring   
Jedi and his unnatural Natalie Portman fixation.  
AUTHOR'S NOTES: At the end.  
  
"Private Showing."  
By Ellie Dee  
  
Skywalker Ranch, California.  
0321Hrs.  
  
"Jimmy, get your butt out of my friggin face!" Hissed Frohike as he got to   
his feet.  
  
"Watch where you're going Jimmy," said Langly. "And keep it down Frohike.   
These Rent-a-cops may not be Stormtroopers, but they're not deaf."  
  
"Sorry guys," replied Jimmy Bond, Gunman Intern.  
  
"Look you three, keep it down," they suddenly heard Byers say over their  
radio headsets. "According to the floor plans the vault should be in the   
room just around the corner."   
  
Carefully the trio made their way to the appropriate door.   
  
"Byers, what's the word?"  
  
Looking at the green tinted TV monitor next to his laptop, Byers could   
see the outline of a door. Checking the readout on his computer, he   
replied, "The security guard is all the way on the other side of the yard,  
so we've got at least 20 minutes before he comes by."  
  
"What you mean 'WE', Pale Face?" mumbled Frohike as he knelt before the door.  
  
"Gee, I didn't know you were Indian."  
  
"Shut up Jimmy."  
  
Taking out his set of lock picks, Frohike went to work. Within seconds the   
door was open and the three were inside.   
  
"Want me to turn on the lights?"  
  
"Sure Jimmy," replied Langly sarcastically. "Then stick your head out the   
door and start yelling till the guards show up."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
Quickly moving over to a cube shaped end table near the window, Frohike   
removed a lamp and began searching the surface. In seconds he found the   
hidden catch. Tripping it, the entire top of the table slid aside revealing  
a metal safe door with an electronic control panel in its center.  
  
Langly elbowed his partner out of the way and set down a pair of devices next  
to the safe. Using an electric drill, he then removed the control panel and   
began to attach leads to various components.  
  
"There, this'll keep the system busy while we're working."   
  
With increasing agitation, the youngest Lone Gunman spent the next several   
minutes attempting to enter the safes access code.  
  
"Dammit! None of these codes Kimmy got us are working." Langly exclaimed.  
  
"What about the Supervisory Code?"   
  
"The first one I tried."   
  
"Why don't you guys just use one of those boxes to read the codes?"   
  
"Jimmy those only work in the movies." Said Langly as he shook his head.   
"I don't know what to try next."  
  
"Why don't you try that?" Asked Jimmy as he pointed to the movie title on   
an old poster hanging on the wall.  
  
"Oh c'mon. He wouldn't try anything that lame."  
  
"Guys we're running out of time!" They could hear Byers say over their   
headsets.   
  
Looking at his partner, Frohike asked, "What have we got to loose?" as he   
typed THX1138 onto the keypad.   
  
Less than a second later the control panel emitted a soft chirp. This was   
followed by a click as the safes solenoids released their bolts.  
  
*****  
  
The following Saturday:  
The Lone Gunmen Newsgroup  
Baltimore, Maryland  
2007Hrs.  
  
Not taking his eyes from the screen at the front of the room, Mulder   
reached into the bag of sunflower seeds sitting between him and Scully.  
  
"According to the News, Lucas reported that three copies were taken."   
Said Mulder as he spit out some shells.  
  
"You don't say." Replied Byers trying to look innocent while holding   
Susan's hand.   
  
"So what did you do with the other copies?"  
  
For several seconds the only sound was John Williams sound track. Then   
from the front row Langly stopped bouncing William on his knee and spoke   
up.   
  
"Don't worry, we got one locked away safe somewhere."  
  
"Yeah, Indiana Jones couldn't even find where we hid it." Added Frohike.  
  
"Good. What about the other?" Asked Skinner as he took a drink of his   
Dr. Pepper.   
  
"We sent it to Mr. Fletcher as a gift." Said Jimmy as he looked over   
at the Assistant Director.  
  
Again only music filled the room, until Scully spun around gaping at   
Jimmy.  
  
"You did what?"  
  
"We sent it to Mr. Fletcher. Yves thought he'd really like to be one   
of the first people to see 'Attack of the Clones'."   
  
Next to Jimmy, Yves was intently examining the ceiling while trying   
not to choke.  
  
Suddenly, all the Gunmen began to laugh.  
  
Staring at her three friends as if they were insane, Scully asked,   
"What?"  
  
Wiping his eyes with a handkerchief, Byers paused to take a breath and   
then replied, "When they took the cassettes, Frohike planted Fletcher's   
fingerprints all over the vault. Plus, we piggybacked his cell phone   
number when we accessed DigiTel Labs to get the specs on the security   
system."  
  
"Yeah," added Langly, "by now the LAPD should be breaking down his door."  
  
"None of that may matter. The government may make him disappear before   
the police can find him, just to keep him quiet." Added Skinner.  
  
Without taking his eyes from the screen, Byers went on, "Well, that   
works too. But just to be sure we leaked some information out onto the   
'Net. By now every Star Wars fan in the world thinks Fletcher stole the   
cassettes and is holding them for ransom."  
  
"My God, they'll kill him!" Exclaimed Reyes.  
  
"That's the general idea," replied Yves.  
  
"Couldn't happen to a nicer guy," added Doggett. Then turning to his   
partner he said, "Pass the popcorn."  
  
Again the room was filled with laughter until Skinner started making   
shushing sounds from the rear of the room.  
  
"Quiet, it's starting."  
  
THE END 


End file.
